It's all about the heart...

Raising children has taught me so much about what really matters. I am reminded daily that what really matters is the heart. I spend much of my time trying to discern who needs discipline and who is a victim...

"He hit me first..." or "That's not fair..." or "I only got a little turn..." or "She always gets the red plate!?"

Do these statements sound familiar to anyone else? One of my favorite things is talking with my kids about these moments. I don't usually love it in the heat of the moment, but I do love our daily talking and walking about these issues. I learn so much about my own heart and about the heart of humanity. Then when we contrast our hearts with the heart of Jesus I am so refreshed. We are so far from having that heart, but the striving for it with the help of our Savior is a wonderful thing.

What I really love is when I catch my kids obeying or submitting or relenting to their siblings with a happy heart. To see the fruit of our talks and to see the joy they feel when they succeed in responding rightly in a situation is so encouraging. It seems that so much time is spent in the heat of sibling arguments, whining, complaining and such...what a blessing those tender mercies are when we see our children producing fruit in their little lives. It is so fun to have older girls who like to talk about these kinds of issues and to see them begin to understand what it means to obey and live life with a sweet heart. To serve others and do their chores or school with purpose and not just because I said so, is such a blessing. To see them want to not only set the table but to fold the napkins pretty and go the extra mile or play with their brothers when they could be doing something girly...this is what I'm talking about.

As I teach and train my kids, as I talk with them about the Lord and living for Him, I get the greatest benefit. I get to learn and grow in my own heart. When it is time to cook dinner or I am interrupted, how do I respond? Do I have a happy heart? Do I do it without complaining? Do I go the extra mile? Being a mom has taught me about being selfless. As I am teaching my kids to be selfless and more concerned about others, what am I doing? Am I putting others before myself or am I fighting for my own time or space or whatever? It isn't enough to do my duties as a mother and wife...anyone can do tasks. My desire is that I would serve my family in all I do, the big and little things, with a happy heart. And that I'd go the extra mile. That I would give everyone else the red plate and still be able to smile because of the joy of responding rightly.

I dare say there is no other job that requires as much selflessness as the job of motherhood. And I get to learn it all on the most simple level...as a child. They say you learn the most when you teach. I believe it. I feel like I have learned more about my own heart and life and motives in the last eight and a half years than I have in all my life. I am so thankful for the blessing of raising children both when it is a joy, and when it is a challenge.

What I do matters, but my heart behind my actions is what matters even more...